Episode 3 – The Ultimate Statistic

Episode Notes

This is our Death Perception Podcast and I’m Joe Casper. Our podcast discusses all of the myths and mysteries of the funeral business. We also talk about living life and doing the best you can for as long as you can. It’s all about the now. The ultimate statistic, some people say the two inevitables are death and taxes. No. You can reach a point where you don’t pay taxes, but you don’t reach a point where you don’t get that one death. It’s called death perception, and I’m Joe Casper. Now, people talk about their own funeral and what they want to do for themselves, and in fact, it is the ultimate layaway plan. Let’s talk about funerals and funeral arrangements. Let’s talk about the future of funeral services. I am a funeral service provider who looks at death perception positively. There are four ways funeral costs are paid. One, the deceased has money. Two, the family has money. Three, you are trying to get some form of state or federal financial assistance. And four, you apply to fund raising effort, like Go Fund Me.

Let’s talk about the myths and mysteries of the funeral service in America, everything you wanted to know but were afraid to ask. Today’s funeral trend in America is a cremation followed by a celebration of life. The old-fashioned traditional funeral will soon go, and is going away with the same speedy dispatch as calling 411 for a phone number, reading a newspaper, or standing in line at the bank. For most people, the traditional funeral has become financially unaffordable. A 10, 12, $15,000 funeral will not be happening with in five years, in my opinion. This is indeed the new now.

Times they are a changing, and this is not about the isn’t. It isn’t up to someone in the funeral business to tell you how you should best deal and cope with the loss of a loved one. It is, after all, the funeral service for the deceased. What would they want you to do? It isn’t and should not be about feeling guilty. As a matter of fact, I tell people to put in the obituary and put it on their Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram listing that what you were doing was at the request of the deceased. That immediately eliminates any guilty blowback. It was his or her wish. Eliminate the guilt factor when making funeral arrangements. It is simply their personal choice.

It is also very important to keep your underwear drawer clean and in order. The reason being is, if something were to happen to you like death, someone will be going through your underwear drawer and every possession you have. One family went into the home of a relative who died, and he had lots of rolled up socks in his underwear drawer. Who wants to keep and wear used socks? So they got a bag and threw them out with the trash. When other family members arrived the next day, they went right to the bedroom and opened his underwear drawer. The drawer was empty. They said, “What happened to his socks?” The other family members answered, “We threw them away.” Those shocks were his savings account. He would fill them with cash and place them securely in his underwear drawer. There is a very good reason that everyone should communicate with each other before trashing the contents of the underwear drawer. Clearly, everything has meaning.

Everything has meaning. For example, funeral directors charge different for exactly the same cremation service. It is important to shop and compare. You do it for everything else, why not for funeral services, as well? The question is, why would you pay lots more for a cremation service? I had a very nice woman call me and ask, “They want thousands more for a simple cremation and you charge thousands less. What is the difference?” I said, “It sounds like thousands more dollars to me.” As my mother said, “Always get a second opinion.” We encourage families to do that for every type of funeral service. That was not always the way. People who were faced with a funeral emergency would go to a funeral home, get a price for a funeral, and then pay that amount. Would you do that with any other personal service? No, of course not. Why then would you do that with a funeral service? If there is an immediately need, contact a few funeral homes, and ask them what they would charge for just a removal. It’s all part of the Federal Trade Commission price list. Once you make that choice, tell the funeral service provider to do just that and nothing else until you meet and decide whether to stay with that funeral service provider or move to another provider. That gives a family time to think and time to plan a plan.

In effect, there is no need to rush unless you feel the need to rush, plus the fact that the Federal Trade Commission prohibits funeral service provider for charging you for anything you don’t agree to. They must provide you with a price list and a business card before you make funeral arrangements, not after. Their published price list enables you to, in effect, shop and compare. Years ago, the focus of the funeral service was selling the casket, inflate the casket price to make the most profit. Now, you can purchase a casket online or through other venues. As a result, the funeral service providers have decreased the cost of the casket and increased the cost for their service fee. The funeral business has been the one industry where people were afraid to get a second opinion. That was then, this is now. Be especially careful and cautious of funeral service fees. The enhanced personal service fee is there to compensate the funeral service provider. It is a fact that families do not challenge the service fee. Years ago, the service fee was basically nonexistent, while the sale of the casket was indeed the point of profit. Markups on the casket were anywhere from two to five times the wholesale purchase price of the casket by the funeral home. Sometimes, casket price markups were even larger. You need to have a funeral service provider to be specific as to what their service fee includes.

A service fee could be appropriate for conducting the funeral you select, but not for meeting to discuss funeral arrangements. Simply put, you should not be paying to compensate the funeral home for their overhead costs. When you purchase furniture, do you also pay an additional service fee for their heat, light, air conditioning, and rugs? Of course you don’t. Why for a funeral? You need to check the funeral sticker price. A moderate service fee for the service you select may be considered, but here is a funeral service price list that I’m looking at that has a service fee of over $3,000. Really? You want the a la carte funeral plan, where you pick and choose every item you want from their price list. You always want the option of getting a second opinion from one or more other funeral service providers. You can actually do business with several funeral service providers. Possession of your loved one does not guarantee anything. It’s what you cherry-pick from the funeral home price list that gets you to determine the best cost for the funeral that you specifically select.

The idea of a complete funeral cost with no itemization is in their best interest, not yours, plus it is a violation of the Federal Trade Commission Funeral Service Regulations. Go online, punch up the funeral regulations, and do check it out. It’s important to know your choice and options. We’re going to talk a lot about a lot during our Death Perception Podcast. The key is to do the best you can, for as long as you can. My goal is to give you inspiration from a fresh perspective. We have lots to talk about and much more to discuss. We have lots of now to talk about. Everyone, thanks for listening. If you enjoyed this Death Perception Podcast, if you could do me a favor and share it with a friend. Please subscribe to be the first to receive information on our newly released Death Perception Podcast. As my mother always said, “Life is a present. It’s a special gift. Chose wisely and wrap it well.” I’m Joe Casper.